Musings (from what’s messed me up only to be God’s message)

This entire roller coaster 🎢 ride has given me all the thrills and chills and spills I never wanted. 😂The lessons have been hard learned as good ones often are. Following God is for real falling away from my wishes, lining up to His. Christ faced false accusations and preposterous rumors ALONE far beyond anything we ever will, so we would never have to. This, this we can handle because He is with us & in us & for us. These, these sweet people who hurt bc they are hurting, we can love because Christ showed us how to love first.

And I am different for having slid into the seat and strapped in snug, clinched fists on the handle bars tight. As a child I screamed in the kiddy coaster “let me off this thing” again & again as round & up & down the rough tracks we raced. But the ride master had to let the machine run its course, finish the run before coaster stopped and we were free to unbuckle and stand again on solid, still ground. I remember feeling so dizzy grandma got me a cold lemonade and rested my head in her lap stroking my hair until the world spinning settled and my stomach with it.

The Ride Master on this crazy coaster-life says we will be off when he says everything has run its course. We willingly stepped onto the ride and He is sitting in the seat with us. It’s His arms strapped around me and His hands I cling to tight. I still scream to get off sometimes often but He whispers gently to my soul “be still” and I do bc He’s the Master, I’m not.

The whiplash of late is this stabbing pain I feel in the heart when my ears hear the unkind words drummed up by misunderstood ideas. The foolish fabrications. Hurts. In this life, I’ve done it. I’ve accused and pointed fingers and assumed and been wrong wrong wrong. I’ve misunderstood, misinterpreted. I’ve been the hurtful and the hurting. Both feel bad. Both leave us wounded.

I thank Daddy God for giving me this experience to feel the cold, gritty mud slung on my face dripped down to my deepest tender soul place. If I hadn’t felt this shame-sting bitter, I might not recognize the danger of destroying another tender soul by taking part in the same acts of filthy slander, again. I needed the warning. I value the awareness. Please God let me never forget. Thank you Jesus for this grace to grasp Your truth and freedom!

No, I’ll not listen to the gossip or perk my ears at the rumors, or dare deposit my two-cents worth on the rest of my one good life ride. By God’s power, I’ll not be a part of what tears down, but what builds up. By His favor, my ears are tuned into the heart of the Ride Master, the voice of His Fierce Spirit. Wind rushes through my well-soul, like cool lemonade and rested head, refreshed and giddy-ready for what’s waiting at the top of this next bend! 🎢🙌🏻🎉❤️whoosh!!